I should have written this post during Diwali or Christmas. Since it was festival season so I had started the Rasoi section. Few days ago, I heard a talk that gave me a motivation-a push to think and write on this topic. The talk started with discussing about a question asked by one of the parents. ‘Should we put Christmas Tree?, Should we tell our kids about Santa?, Should we celebrate Christmas?’ I would say it’s all about bridging of two cultures, whether it be from two different countries or within the same country but different regions.

Till last year, we used to put our daughter’s Christmas Gift under the tree. Yes, we started decorating the tree after she started going to per-school. We decorate it with few ornaments and whatever craft she does at school. That’s it. It is a Mini Tree. Our daughter is 5, she understands the Indian festivals. And more important, she shows her interest and curiosity in knowing the stories and reasons associated with these festivals and rituals. We try our best to do what we do in India. This year we made some changes. We decided what we thought would be right and an ideal way to explain our daughter.

So, we thought of giving her the gift a day or two before Christmas. She asked for this gift sometime during Diwali but that time we got something else and it got postponed. We gave her the gift and told her that it is your Diwali and Christmas gift. In India, we buy new clothes, new things on Diwali. It’s like Christmas for us. Being a kid it was obvious for her to ask that will Santa still give her another gift. But later she herself gave the answer, how come Santa will deliver all the gifts. So you and Baba (in our mother tongue, Baba is for Dad) gave me this.:-) Even at her school when her teacher asked the kids to write their wish list, she wrote ‘My Aai-Baba will be giving me the Kitchen Set.’..:-)

We have decided that from this year, we will give her a gift on Diwali and we will still decorate the tree as we have been doing till now. It’s exciting for kids. We told her that the way we go to temple on Diwali, we do Luxmi Pooja and meet our friends, same way here people go to Church and listen to Jesus stories. Jesus is another God same as we have Bhagwan Krishna, Ganapati & Shankar. She waited for a while then said..’oooo!! that’s why you invited all the moms and my friends for Haldi Kumkum and we had a big Diwali get together with friends and we did a Diwali craft..’

Now, back to the talk. Our speaker told us something similar. I was happy to hear that whatever we did was right. He said, if we follow our culture, tradition at home, do what we are supposed to do then kids will learn that. They do what they see. If our kids will see that every year during festival time we are performing the rituals associated to that festival then it will give answers to all their questions. Questions arise when there is curiosity; when there are some confusions and doubts. Kids will ask you to put Christmas tree, bake cookies, put some cookies and milk for Santa only till a certain age. Let them enjoy that phase. He gave another suggestion that I liked a lot. He said, if possible, have your friends over, let the kids exchange the gifts and after Pooja open those gifts. This small gesture will help them to remember the things that we do.

This example was something that shows the contrast in two cultures. You come across this kind of contrast more often when you are raising your kid outside India (not necessarily in USA). Even in India, now a days people move to different places because of their work. Very few actually stay in their home town. But even then people have started celebrating all the festivals with all its pomp and pleasure irrespective of its region. They become a part of that region’s culture and also follow their own family tradition. I grew up in Kanpur, Uttar Pradesh. Holi is one of the major festivals in North India. But in Maharashtra, it’s not. Still, my mom used to make all the sweets that North Indians make during Holi. And also, for Diwali we used to do what we do in Maharashtra. So this way we never had a doubt.

 In short, celebrate the happiness that friends are always giving, make every day a holiday and celebrate just living! I would say all the festivals give us another chance to connect with each other. So, understand the true meaning of happiness and live your life to its fullest. Please do share what you feel about this topic.