In today’s fast-paced and ever-changing world, fostering a growth mindset and resilience in children is more important than ever. These traits help kids navigate challenges, develop a love for learning, and build emotional strength to handle setbacks.

We know that growth mindset helps to embrace challenges, persist through difficulties, and see effort as a path to mastery. Encouraging this mindset helps us to develop a lifelong love for learning and adaptability in the face of adversity. So, when it is of so much importance, why do kids find it hard to incorporate it?

Why do kids find it hard to incorporate a growth mindset & resilience?

1. They are unsure about their parent’s reaction to their actions
2. They don’t want to go through the long process of experiments and want instant results
3. They have never seen their adults facing any adverse situation. we don’t want to show our weak side to our kids-
4. They haven’t experienced the power of a growth mindset
5. Since they haven’t experienced the power of a growth mindset, they see even a small setback as a failure
6. They are yet to learn the power of pause

Before we talk about the ways, let’s ask ourselves these 4 questions:

1. Do I practice a growth mindset?
2. When was the last time I showed resilience?
3. Am I calm most of the time?
4. How do I handle the situation when my child doesn’t meet my expectations?  -What do I say to my child -Do I react or respond?

What we can do as a parent?

1.Curiosity over Judgment: When we are curious, it makes us wonder. We don’t judge instead we look for solutions. When we show curiosity about our child’s problem, behavior, or any action, we give them the confidence to speak up, vent out, and share their feelings. They are not scared about our reaction.

2.Understanding the Importance of Gazing in: Here, we are talking about the reflection from a kid’s point of view. Please encourage them to reflect upon their actions. Ask them questions (as discussed in the previous point) about why they decided to behave in a certain way or picked a specific action. Or could they have done anything differently? When you show curiosity and show them that there could be other options, slowly, they also start to develop that approach.

3.Practice MGI instead of LGI of your kid’s behavior: MGI stands for most generous interpretation, and LGI stands for least generous interpretation. More than 50% of the time, we function in LGI mode. Don’t blame yourself. Without extra effort, the human brain goes into this mode. It’s natural. It tends to look for what is not right. But think about those moments when you have seen the most generous side of your child’s personality. When facing a challenging situation, if you can verbalize how you appreciate your child’s side of personality, you are teaching them to look for a silver lining even in adverse conditions.

4.Tolerance to inconvenience: If your child shows unacceptable behavior, you don’t have to start feeling embarrassed immediately. Validate their feelings. Get curious to know the reason behind their behavior.

5.Be curious about your own experience: While we are trying to develop a growth mindset and resilience in our kids, it is crucial to understand our thought process. Why do we feel how and what we feel? Are we able to handle our emotions? You can see why curiosity is so important in parenting.

You may like: Developing Emotional Literacy

Ways to encourage a growth mindset & resilience in kids:

1.Praise Effort, Not Just Results and encourage problem solving approach
Instead of saying, “You’re so smart,” try “I love how hard you worked on this.” Instead of offering immediate solutions, ask, “What do you think we should do?” This empowers kids to think critically and develop independence.

2.Emphasize the Power of ‘Yet’
Guide kids in setting small, achievable goals. Success in these goals builds confidence and encourages them to take on bigger challenges. This is a wonderful opportunity to teach them to reframe challenges by adding “yet.” For example, “I can’t do this” becomes “I can’t do this yet.” This small shift encourages perseverance.

3.Model a Growth Mindset
Children learn by observing adults. When facing a challenge, verbalize your thought process: “This is tough, but I’ll figure it out.” This will help them reframe failure as growth. While doing this, introduce a growth -oriented language.

4.Encourage Learning from Mistakes
Let children take on new challenges, even if failure is a possibility. Teach them that mistakes are opportunities to learn rather than something to far. In this, a strong support system reassures children that they are not alone in their struggles.

5.Teach Emotional Regulation
Help children identify and express their emotions in healthy ways. Encourage gratitude and positive thinking. Ask kids to share something good about their day to shift focus from challenges to achievements. Breathing exercises, journaling, or talking about feelings can build emotional intelligence.

7 C’s of resilience

1.Competence – develop a belief in them that they can handle the situation

2.Confidence – have confidence in their abilities

3.Connection– give them a safe space to vent out

4.Character– no matters how stressful the situation is, never compromise with your values and character

5.Coping – give them the coping tools (emotional regulation, power of yet, problem solving approach, Breathing exercises, journaling building EI)

6.Control – make them understand that their actions have an impact on others as well

7.Contribution – as an individual, how are they contributing towards the community

Learn from experts:

If you are looking for expert’s advice, register yourself to Super-Charging Kids’ Brain Summit. You can use my referral link. This summit is designed to help parents understand what actually fuels healthy brain development—and how they can nurture it at home in simple, practical ways. It’s a free 3-day event, featuring masterclasses from top experts in parenting, psychology, child development, and nutrition. Parents can watch each day’s talks for 24 hours, or upgrade to the VIP Pass for lifetime access, downloads, transcripts, and bonus content.

Final Thoughts:

“To keep the lamp burning, we have to keep putting oil in in.” – Mother Teresa

Similarly, developing a growth mindset and resilience in children is an ongoing process that requires patience and consistency. By creating an environment that values effort, embraces challenges, and nurtures emotional strength, we equip kids with the tools they need to thrive in life. With these skills, they will be better prepared to face challenges head-on, view setbacks as opportunities, and cultivate a lifelong love for learning.