Recently, I read Stillness is the key by Ryan Holiday. It talks about the ability to slow things down, clarify your thinking, and clarify your soul, which means directing our efforts and being steady while the world spins. In short, living an intentional life and not getting into the rat race. I am sure each one of us wants to live such a life. The first step towards leading such a life is replacing FOMO (Fear of missing out) with JOMO (Joy of missing out). JOMO is also considered an ‘emotionally intelligent antidote to FOMO.’
Related article: FOMO or ROMO?
It is tough to think when we are drowning in information. In fact, that’s why intelligence operatives flood the enemy with propaganda, which causes them to lose the scent of the truth. The goal of this practice is referred to as Analysis paralysis.
With so much going on around us, it is obvious for us to feel left out. We want to be at the top of everything. If we have the latest information, then we feel accomplished. We feel welcome when our friends make us a part of our celebration. But how long should we be dependent on these factors for our happiness? Shouldn’t we find something that can enable us to live a happy and content life? The answer to this is JOMO. The joy of missing out!
At this point, I am recalling lines from Shri. Harivanshrai Bachhan’s poem. मन का हो तो अच्छा और ना हो तो और भी अच्छा meaning If it is as per your wish then it is good and if not then it is even better. Why? Because God must have planned something better for us. Seeing JOMO from this line’s lens, there must be some reason behind it if we miss some information. Sometimes, ignorance is bliss. Less information, less worries.
Let me give you an example. Your friend does not invite you to his/her theme party; you see party pics on Instagram. You see your friends enjoying themselves and having a blast. Now, FOMO will pull you down. It will make you feel left out and miserable. On the other hand, JOMO will make you happy by making you realize how you used your time productively. You were saved from worrying about what to wear for the theme party or managing your schedule.
Living in the slowest lane is hard when other lanes are moving fast. We get restless, impatient, and frustrated. We want to change lanes, but JOMO can be helpful. It allows us to spend time with ourselves, reflect upon our actions, and make better decisions. Let’s see how we can bring JOMO into our lives.
How we can bring JOMO into our lives?
Reflect upon your actions: When we think about intentional living, first, we need to reflect upon our actions. Are we spending time doing or expecting something that isn’t worth our efforts and energy? Recognize the activities that give you stress and those that bring you happiness. For example, if you are known for remembering birthdays and anniversaries, but that brings you stress, then it’s okay to let it go. You will not miss out on anything if you are not the first person to wish.
Not expecting too much from yourself: Unnecessarily raising our expectation bar creates unnecessary stress and doesn’t take us anywhere. We all want to feel accomplished and recognized for our actions or work. However, each one of us has a different potential, and knowing your strengths and weaknesses will help you set realistic goals.
Enjoying the stillness for a while: It is not necessary that our lives be filled with happening moments all the time. Sometimes, let the stillness take its place and give you time to breathe. Let it flow at a slow pace. To enjoy a day at the beach, we need calm water. Right? Thats the kind of stillness we need in our life o regular interval.
Do not compare yourself with others: There will be people who have more updated information than you do, and it is better to accept that. It is not necessary to get involved in a competition and disturb your mental sanity while doing it.
Bringing JOMO is relatively easy. Try to live in the present moment, find beauty in stillness, and learn to enjoy it. Enjoy your own company, and get to work on your own projects. It would help if you used your time in a way that allows you to act on intent-based ideas, such as creative projects or spending time with the people you care about the most. This means JOMO is about embracing your present circumstances and choices. Be it taking a pause or stopping doing what you are doing to see your progress so far. It’s a way to reframe how you experience your life, and as you reflect on what you could’ve done, you’ll find that you have become better at making wiser choices in advance.
