Usually, we say motherhood is when a woman is re-born. It is absolutely true. Not just the birthing process is a totally different experience but the whole journey of motherhood starting from the point when she comes to know that she is going to be a mother. Her body changes, her mood changes, her temperament changes; she changes. And then comes the moment which she has been waiting for. Holding her baby changes her one more time. But that’s it not the last time when she undergoes such change. It continues with every stage of her child’s growth. Sometimes she surprises herself seeing in the mirror. Is this “Me”? But then a smile strikes on her face accompanied with a proud feeling of being a mother or should I say Super Mom for her kids..:) “Super mom”. That’s what her kids address her. Isn’t?
I have changed a lot after I became a mother. I gained lots of patience. My friends say, “you don’t have to gain patience Alpana, you are already patient”. But I know it has increased a lot for sure. First time when I got this compliment was when I flew with my 1.5 year old daughter to India on a 19 hours flight. The lady, who sat in the front row said, “I salute your calmness and patience. You didn’t raise your voice a single time throughout the journey.” And I realized, yes..it is? But my 1.5 taught me to be calm even if she is getting impatient. She taught me to have a smile because being upset is not going to help us.
Not giving up and looking for solution is something that motherhood changed in me. I remember, when my daughter turned 5, she decided to have her 7th birthday as shape themed. Just by listening to this idea, I was in question mark how to plan for it. But she said, “don’t worry..I know you will do it.” So, when daughter is so confident, mamma has to look for some solution.
Our priorities are different; WE don’t get to come first anymore. Even for eating out, I think alright where my kids would like to eat so that we all can have a good family time.
I am stronger emotionally. Children depend on you for their emotional strength. I’ve realized this numerous times when dealing with illnesses, injuries, and temper tantrums. My kids need me to handle things gracefully, so I’ve learned to do so—most of the time.
It changed the way I look at my mom. Earlier, it was more about her teachings and values she passed on to me but now its about her sacrifices, sleepless nights, emotional roller coaster and many more she had gone through.
As mothers, we live in world where magazines and social media will try to convince us that we should try to be ourselves even when we have a baby in our life or say reclaim our pre-baby life. But is it possible. Motherhood changes us because it’s supposed to change us. No one ask her to change, it happens naturally. Motherhood changes you. Painfully, and beautifully, it changes you.
What do you think? How motherhood has changed you?